


Somewhere In My Memory

by Ravenclaw_Peredhel



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, And she is gonna fuck shit up, Anohrah, Big Brother Feemor, But With An Original Character, Come on Star Wars fandom, Dai Bendu (Star Wars), Dara is here, F/M, Feemor is wonderful, Gen, Good Brother Feemor, How are neither of these a tag, How is this not a tag, Jedi Have Feelings, Jedi Temple (Star Wars), Original Universe, Room of a Thousand Fountains (Star Wars), Self-Insert, The Jedi Are People Too, Yoda is a Troll, Yoda is also an Honorary Youngling, Yoda's Disaster Lineage (Star Wars), fucking shit up, i love that word
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:56:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29533719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravenclaw_Peredhel/pseuds/Ravenclaw_Peredhel
Summary: Mallory is pretty sure she went to sleep somewhere else.She's also pretty sure she was an adult called Mallory, rather than a baby called Dara.She could be wrong.But she's also pretty sure this is her second life. Oh, and she's got Force powers now.This is definitely not a normal dream.
Comments: 16
Kudos: 35
Collections: A Collection of Beloved Inserts, SelfInserts OCs Reincarnation and Time Travel





	1. Maybe Waking Up Was A Bad Idea

Mallory was fairly certain that she was dying in a hospital. She was also fairly certain that she was an adult. 

Nowhere in her memory was being moved to this strange snowy place, or of being turned into a toddler. 

Perhaps this was a fevered dream conjured by her brain so that she would be happy when she passed. 

_Or_ _maybe_ , whispered a small, rather unwelcome part of her mind, _this is real._

She determinedly ignored that part. 

Instead, she decided to enjoy the dream - unrealistic as it was, the view was beautiful. Towering snow covered mountains, with bright sunshine glinting off them as the sun set, enclosing a beautiful white city.

A rustle sounded near her ear, and it drew her attention nearer to where she was. There was an arm around her, holding her up. She patted it curiously, and a low laugh sounded in her ear. "Do you like the view darling? Is it pretty?" Deciding that, in for a sheep in for a lamb, she may as well act the part her brain had given her, she gurgled and pointed out. "You like it? You like it? Oh such a pretty clever little baby! Who's the best baby?" Mallory took the opportunity to take a good look at the woman her mind had provided. Bright red hair, dark blue eyes, and creamy, not pale, skin. She was tall, at least from what Mallory's infant perspective could provide, and overall quite beautiful.

"Ales? I'm home." A man's voice cut off the now-named Ales's cooings and she smiled brightly. 

"In here Ched! I've got Dara with me." Wow...this dream was detailed. Mallory turned the names over in her mind. 

'Ched' entered, and Mallory evaluated him with a cool glance. Black hair and eyes, quite good-looking, wearing almost medievalish clothes. He and Ales made a striking couple, Mallory decided. And they seemed nice enough. She would like growing up with parents like th- her brain screeched to a halt. This was a dream. A remarkably detailed and cohesive dream, but a dream all the same. And yet...her mind had never conjured something so detailed or so beautiful before. She let out a small shriek of frustration, which had the unintended side effect of garnering her parent's, no the dream constructs, no parents, _people's_ attention. 

Immediately she was engulfed in cuddles and apologies for ignoring her. She must be an only child, and her parents must be quite young for this sort of reaction. Mallory gave up. Obviously, somehow she had been transferred through space and time into a toddler's body. She promised herself a good old freak out later, but for now enjoyed basking in the adoration of her new parents, something that she had rarely had as the middle of three children. 

...the cooing and doting could get a little annoying, Mallory decided. 

**************

_"Commander Cody. Execute Order 66."_

_"It will be done my Lord."_

_"It's treason then."_

_"Do it!"_

_"It is not the Jedi way."_

_"We are encouraged to love unconditionally."_

_"He is the Chosen One!"_

_"You were supposed to bring balance to the Force!"_

_"I am the Dark Lord of the Sith."_

_"My hunger is as boundless as my power."_

_"Always two, there are."_

_"The Line of Bane."_

_"I call for a vote of no-confidence in Chancellor Valorum."_

_"Tell your sister...you were right."_

_"Soon, I'm going to be a Jedi."_

_"Snips."_

_"Skyguy."_

_"Traitor."_

_"Liar!"_

_"Father!"_

_"What if I told you that the Republic was now under the control of the Dark Lord of the Sith?"_

_"Good soldiers follow orders._ _Good soldiers follow orders."_

Mallory, no, Dara now, woke up crying. Again. 

Every night since she had somehow been...transplanted, she had had terrible dreams. A lot of them often contained lines from the Star Wars franchise, which was super odd, but often it was just flashes of horrible images that flickered across her juvenile brain and left scarring that no child below their first year of life should bear. 

The worst part was, there was no way she could tell her parents about it. At eight months old, she did not have the physical ability use words. She could barely sit up on her own. Instead, all she could do was cry and try to forget the horrible things she saw. 

A light flicked on, and her mother stumbled sleepily into her room, followed by her father. "I'm sure babies aren't supposed to cry this much." Ales said a bit tearfully, as she rocked the screaming baby. "Are we doing something wrong? I've been trying everything I can, but she wakes up like this every night." 

Ched looked just as tired and frazzled as his wife, and ~~Mallory~~ Dara felt very guilty. It was her fault that they kept being rudely awoken by her screams. But she just couldn't stop crying once she was distressed. Probably because of the whole baby thing. 

"Maybe...maybe there's something, you know, wrong. No, not like that Ales, more like something the doctors missed when she was born. Like...her heart or something."

"There's nothing wrong with our baby Ched!"

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "Can't we at least take her in and get her tested...just to see?" 

It took several minutes of arguing, during which ~~Mal~~ Dara's sense of guilt only grew. On the bright side, she had stopped crying. Eventually, Ales agreed, and as soon as the sun rose the next day, the couple took their baby into a medical centre. 

Dara did _not_ approve or like it. In such a high-tech place, you would think that they would find a nicer way to take blood tests and things rather than just sticking a needle into a helpless crying baby. But no. Apparently the needle really was necessary. 

She took a vicious pleasure in screaming as loudly as possible every time the needle entered her poor abused little body. And every time it was taken out, for good measure. 


	2. Welcome To Jedi-Land

"Ched and Ales Tanh?" ~~Ma~~ Dara glared at the horrible furry lady who had spent half an hour poking needles into her. 

"Is something wrong?" Certainly the lady looked frazzled. 

"No, not wrong per se. Uh...I'm not really sure how to tell you this. But, um. Maybe you should contact the Jedi Temple on Coruscant."

"The Jedi?" Dara thought that her parents sounded rather winded. Not that she wasn't - this meant she was _inside_ the Star Wars universe. Whether it meant she was really not dreaming or that she really was dreaming, she was less sure. 

"Yes...I'm not sure how our earlier tests missed it, but your daughter has a midichlorian count of 16, 200."

Dara would have rolled her eyes if she thought her soft baby muscles were up to it. Of course she was Force-sensitive. Every time she had ever read a Star Wars fanfiction, unless it concentrated on someone like Shmi or Padmé, it was about a Force-sensitive. It made sense that she would be so. Maybe this wasn't a dream. 

**************************

The Jedi came two weeks later - a tall, serene-faced Togruta woman with a bouncy, excited human girl beside her. Theu introduced themselves as Jedi Knight Shaak Ti and Jedi Padawan Hebe Vels, which made the adult part of her mind shriek with aggravation - of all the times to be born, she had to be born so that she would be very definitely in the thick of an _inter-galactic_ _war_. 

The infant part? Well that was focused on screaming and clinging (or the infant equivalent) to her mother. She did _not_ want to leave her lovely, kind, doting parents for anything. Okay, so she had only been theirs for six months. So what? They were still her parents, and she still loved them. 

Eventually the adult part reminded her that she should really quieten down and listen to the conversation. 

"- for, of course." Damn it. She had probably missed something important.

"But will she be loved, Master Jedi? Dara has a family here on Alderaan, a family who's love is assured for as long as she will live. Can you say the same for your Temple?" Huh, Alderaan. She would not have pegged this for Alderaan. Also...shoot, Alderaan. Dara made a mental note to destroy any possible Death Star plans if possible. Also murder Palps. And possibly Dooku (he might be an okay guy, who knew).

The Jedi Knight hesitated. Not that Dara blamed her - her mother was rather scary when something upset her life. "Anohrah," and wow, the Dai Bendu thing was actually...Dara had no words for it. It really did have a feeling in the Force - this word, she knew meant the Jedi Temple, and it felt...well, it felt like home. "Anohrah is the home of well over ten thousand Jedi, and we all consider ourselves family in one way or another."

"That isn't what I meant Master Jedi. Will. My. Daughter. Have. A. Family?"

"In a way." She held up a hand as Ales opened her mouth. "If you will let me finish Madam. Any family formed among the Jedi is...unconventional to say the least. It is hard to explain to an outsider, but allow me to try. All Jedi begin their path in the creche, where they are sorted into Clans. Sort of like classes, but closer. The children in these groups spend the first decade or so of their lives together, and are always very close as a result. I guess you could say they are siblings. Once they are old enough, they will either be picked by a Knight or Master from one of the different Corps. They will spend the next fifteen-ish years being taught by this Master, and often the relationship that the pair form is akin to that of parent and child. Previous students of that master, are considered older siblings. We also have a lineage, as we name it, which consists of the master's own padawan-siblings, and their master and that master's and so on." 

Ales sniffed, and Ched jumped in. "As lovely as it sounds, I'm still not sure I want my only child to go somewhere where love is forbidden. I want her to have her own choice once she is old enough, not to be bound by the rules of an Order."

"Ah. Yes, that is a common misconception of the Jedi. The Code forbids dangerous attachments, rather than romantic relationships, as many believe. "

"And what does that mean?"

Ti looked rather lost. "Well...uh...I'm not really sure how to explain. Ah, romantic relationships, are often associated with stories of people who have thrown away everything for each other - for example, the tale of Beren and Lúthien from that old holodrama ummm, the Silmarillion. You know it?" Ales and Ched nodded. "Well, relationships such as those create large problems for people at large. We Jedi are peacekeepers, diplomats - we cannot just throw everything away for a personal attachment when it could have terrible repurcussions for billions, if not trillions of people. When entering a relationship, Jedi must be certain that they can put the mission, and the millions suffering, before one that they love." 

"Well..."

It took several hours of talking, during which Dara fell asleep no less than three times and was passed between her parents eight times, but eventually her parents reluctantly came to the conclusion that she really would be happy in the Jedi Order. After Shaak and Hebe had explained at length the dangers facing untrained Force-sensitives. She was not particularly pleased at the decision, but also knew that she had no choice. Also, Ched and Ales were doing what they believed best for her, and she couldn't blame them at all. 

Plus, they looked so devastated as they said goodbye to her that she really couldn't blame them. Shaak looked horribly guilty for taking a child away from its parents, and she went up quite a bit in Dara's estimation. Hebe just looked shy.

Ales was openly weeping as she kissed her baby daughter and handed her over, and Ched wasn't much better. They clearly loved her a lot, and she started to cry when she felt strange arms holding her. That was the only reason. She was a baby, it was a reasonable reaction. 

The Jedi started to walk away, leaving her parents standing together, looking oddly lonely with just the two of them. Dara realised suddenly that if she ever saw them again, they would not expect her to remember them. The enormity of their decision suddenly loomed before her. Hebe's loos Padawan braid tickled her, and she sneezed, before crying louder than ever. A strange, comfoting warmth surrounded her, and she relaxed a bit, until Hebe's hair tickled her again. Deciding enough was enough, she reached out to Shaak. She had nice smooth montrals that wouldn't tickle her. 

Thankfully, the two Jedi got the gist of what she wanted, and Shaak took her easily. Se didn't drop her, and her montrals did not tickle her. Dara decided that Shaak was her new favourite Jedi. 

***************

Dara threw up as soon as they entered hyperspace. All over Hebe's shoulder. Not on purpose. She was an infant, she didn't have any controls over her bodily functions. It made her feel a little bad. 

Shaak just sighed and sent the tearful Hebe to clean herself up. "If I pick you up, will you vomit all over me?" Tilting her head to the side, Dara considered. Well, she didn't feel like she was going to throw up again. She let out a toothless gurgle and held her arms up. 

The Jedi Knight smiled and picked her up, holding her gently and humming a little tune as she rocked her. 

Dara wondered, with a sort of sick horrfied fascination, how Shaak really had died. 


End file.
